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'Bachelorette' Gabby Windey says this Netflix reality show inspired her to explore her bisexuality
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Date:2025-04-20 13:00:20
Former "Bachelorette" lead Gabby Windey's journey to dating her girlfriend, comedian Robby Hoffman, involved decades of ignoring the signs that she's attracted to women.
"There had been signs since my childhood, and you kind of just get to the point where you allow the whisper to get louder, basically," Windey, 32, said in an interview with Glamour published Tuesday.
"I've always felt really emotionally connected to my girlfriends, some of which have ended in breakups so emotional, it feels like how you would in a romantic relationship," she explained. "And there were probably other things that I just suppressed or told myself was nothing."
Late-night thoughts of "What if I was gay?" "became louder and louder" for Windey.
"It was almost like I was afraid for it to happen for some reason," she said, adding that her fear likely also stemmed from growing up in a "Middle America conservative community … I was not around any gay people, especially not gay women."
Earlier this month, Windey came out on "The View" and announced that she has a girlfriend. This week, she debuted her new relationship with Bachelor Nation during Monday's live finale of "The Bachelorette" Season 20.
Windey was one of two bachelorettes last year, sharing the lead role with Rachel Recchia as they dated 32 men.
How 'Perfect Match' made Gabby Windey think about her sexuality
When discussing her sexuality with friends, Windey said she was told her curiosity was "just a phase" because she's "as straight as they come."
"But I was just like, 'But what if?' and luckily I have that natural curiosity and the strength to listen to myself, because that's exactly what happened," she said.
Seeing fellow reality TV stars openly be themselves on the Netflix reality dating show "Perfect Match" ended up inspiring Windey to explore her sexuality. "The show had an openly bi, lesbian storyline with Francesca and Abbey, and it seemed just very genuine. Something inside of me could relate, and I thought, 'Maybe I need to explore this,'" she said.
Earlier this year, Windey opened a profile on the dating app Raya and found that she "wasn’t really looking at the men." Later, she ended up meeting Hoffman through a mutual friend while they were at the same bar and went on their first date the following week.
'A love that I always wanted':'Bachelor' star Gabby Windey announces she has a girlfriend
Gabby Windey says bisexual would be 'the most honest label for me'
Being in a relationship with Hoffman has been "an awakening," Windey said.
"It's serendipitous and kismet and kind of spiritual, but also very stable. We were both meant for a big type of love, and now it's finally here," she said.
Windey added, "I just know after dating women, I don’t think I would ever date a man again. I feel so emotionally connected to my girlfriend and that's what’s most important for me."
She understands why the public would want her to put a label on her sexuality. "I guess 'bisexual' would be the most honest label for me, but I don’t know," she said.
Windey is not the only "Bachelor" alum who has started a same-sex relationship after having a heterosexual romance on the show. Last year, Becca Tilley, who was nearly engaged to Chris Soules on his season of "The Bachelor" in 2015, revealed she had been dating singer Hayley Kiyoko for four years.
"A powerful act of strength":Coming out isn’t actually over. Here’s why
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